1. WHO I WAS
If you knew me before 2019, you'd probably say I was one of the most positive people you’d ever met. Always smiling. Always around people. Always in the gym, playing football, running, helping others—full of life.
I moved from Croatia to Ireland in 2015. Things were going great. I was training 5–6 times a week, entered a few amateur bodybuilding shows, read books, worked on myself, and genuinely loved life.
I thought I had everything under control.
But no one really sees it coming when things fall apart.
2. THE CRASH
2019 hit me like a wall.
Mentally, physically—completely. I broke.
Working 80 hours a week, no sleep, junk food, no training, endless stress. I hadn’t stepped into a gym in over half a year. I was just surviving day to day.
Then the symptoms started:
Dizziness.
Brain fog.
Chest pain.
Confusion.
Panic attacks out of nowhere.
And the scariest part—I didn’t feel like myself anymore. It was like watching your own mind fall apart.
I couldn’t focus. Couldn’t talk to people. Couldn't explain what was happening to me.
I quit my job. Cut everyone off. I just needed to be alone.
Every single day, I thought I was dying.
And if I wasn’t, I kinda wished I was—because I couldn’t go on like this.
3. THE EDGE
I hit my lowest point.
A friend of mine had just taken his own life—and I felt dangerously close to doing the same. I remember one night just saying to God:
“Either give me the strength to get through this… or take me. I can’t keep living like this.”
And then… one phone call changed everything.
The one person I still trusted picked up the phone. We hadn’t spoken in almost two years. But she answered. Her voice, her silly smile, her energy… gave me something I desperately needed:
Hope.
4. THE FIGHT
That night I made a decision:
I didn’t know how I’d get out of this—but I had to try. One more time.
I went fully plant-based. Honestly? I’d read somewhere that people healed serious conditions doing it. I figured, what the hell do I have to lose?
After a month and a half, I started feeling slightly better. Just enough to keep going.
COVID hit, which made it harder—but I forced myself out of the house. First for five-minute walks. Then longer. Then slow jogging.
And then... the gym.
I still remember standing on the treadmill, heart racing—not from exercise, but from fear.
What if I collapsed?
What if something happened to me?
Then I thought: Worst case? I pass out and they figure out what’s wrong with me.
So I started. Step by shaky step.
Each week, I got stronger. Not just physically—but mentally.
I stopped resisting it. I started accepting it.
I told myself, Fake it until you make it.
And honestly? It worked.
5. THE RISE
It took me almost three years to feel like myself again.
To sleep.
To smile.
To laugh.
To lift without fear.
To walk into a shop without thinking I might pass out.
Three years of tiny wins.
One phone call.
A never-give-up mindset.
And the gym.
That’s how I came back to life.
6. WHY BADSIDE EXISTS
BADSIDE isn’t just a name. It’s a part of me.
We all have that dark season—that bad side.
The version of ourselves that’s scared, broken, lost.
But that’s also the side that teaches us who we really are.
This brand was born not out of perfection, but out of pain.
It’s for the fighters.
For the ones rebuilding themselves piece by piece.
For anyone who’s ever felt like giving up but didn’t.
We are stronger than we think.
There’s more inside you than you realise.
Give up? Never.
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